A Humorous Guide to Religious Differences

CHANGING A LIGHT BULB THE RELIGIOUS WAY

How many people does it take to change a light bulb?


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Charismatics: Only 1
Hands are already in the air.


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Pentecostals: 10
One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.


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Presbyterians: None
Lights will go on and off at predestined times.


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Roman Catholics: None - Candles only.


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Baptists : At least 15
One to change the light bulb, and 3 committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.


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Episcopalians: 3
One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.


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Mormons: 5
One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.


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Unitarians :
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs
work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore
a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.


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Methodists: Undetermined
Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb.
Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.


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Nazarenes: 6
One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.


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Lutherans: None
Lutherans don't believe in change.


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Amish:
What's a light bulb?