"I went to Jerusalem to become acquainted (Gk. istoria) with Cephas" - Paul's words from Galatians 1:18.

10 Reasons for Practicing Muslims to Enroll at SWBTS

In honor of today's SBC seminary reports at the Southern Baptist Convention in Baltimore, I thought I'd give 10 reasons why practicing Muslims ought to consider enrolling at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary.

1). You will be given your own private room so nobody will be offended by your prayer life or you theirs.

2). You will be allowed to smoke tobacco, just as long as you don't do it in front of administration and as long as you will allow administration to pretend you always abide by 'the moral code' (for the record, many of us believe the administration's moral code against 'smoking' is puerile).

3). You will be given an on campus job at the seminary, working among other evangelical pastors in need of work as well. The seminary does a good job providing for their own.

4). You will not have to listen to long introductions or stories from missionaries about their work in foreign lands as you sit among them at Prayer Breakfasts. They will, of course, be kind and personal with you (as they always are), just not reciprocal in sharing their own stories.

5). You can obtain the most inexpensive accredited Ph.D. in theology with an emphasis in 'archaeology' on the continent of North America, funded by Southern Baptists.

6). You won't have to attend all the required seminary chapels or be expected to share your faith during the week.

7). You will join other 'cousins' attending SWBTS who believe something other than what administration deems the truth.

8). You will never have to worry about being picked to speak at the Southern Baptist Convention on the advantages of obtaining a SBC seminary degree.

9). You will leave SWBTS with a working, intimate knowledge of SBC mission work around the world.

10). You can put on your 'resume' - Ph.D. Southwestern Theological Baptist Seminary, Fort Worth, Texas, and be denied employment in every Sharia Law country and then request asylum in the US and help your fellow cousins as they build mosques on US soil.

Once you graduate, I hope you are a spokesperson for the freedom granted all faiths in a country built on the principles of liberty, equality, and human dignity. We Baptists have played a huge roll throughout our country's history in making the United States 'the land of the free.'

29 comments:

The Govteach said...

As I have said in the past, my graduate work at SWBTS both helped me and hindered me in finding a teaching position in Texas Public Schools.
The further east I went the better it was, in the Austin, the Hill Country, I couldn't buy a job.....

Wade Burleson said...

Neo-fundamentalism and strict moral ideology makes brothers of those of different faiths who hold to the same moral code, and cousins of evangelicals who view the moral code as a cover for the gospel. Such neo-fundamentalist institutions have a way of making it hard on graduates in cultures other than idealogical ones.

Anonymous said...

You might also get a job at Patterson's house teaching Dorothy how to cook Muslim style. Of course she can then teach all of her doctoral students what she's learned.

ScottShaver said...

A Sharia Division of the Theology School at SWBTS might also aid in cross-cultural evangelism?

Wade Burleson said...

Who would have thought?

Debbie Kaufman said...

This is what I don't understand. Letting a Muslim who is a practicing Muslim in is OK, but not Christians who are divorced, a woman teaching impeccably or one who is not Anabaptist.

A Muslim or other cult, non-Christian is seen as a evangelism opportunity while the others are not seen as Christians, brothers/sisters in Christ but cousins or even further down the food chain. I just don't get it. And nothing is said, it's just seen as not there. Wow. I and you, others see the elephant in the room, but yet to others it's not there. Peace at any price is not peace. It's fake. It's not dealing with reality which brings it further from Christ not closer.

Debbie Kaufman said...

The Convention is no longer a place to deal with problems, it's just a 2 day get away, to look good to the press, world, and go home. No problems, just happy, happy Christians with sunshiny faces. Good thing God sees the heart and not the outside that we look at huh? He definitely sees the elephant in the room.

Anonymous said...

What about the elephant in most churches?

Debbie Kaufman said...

Yes, I agree anonymous.

Anonymous said...

What about this one? You will have undenied access to the locations of our foreign missionaries so you can report back to the Taliban as to their whereabouts!

Anonymous said...

What about your relative allowing atheist? This time you got spanked

Debbie Kaufman said...

I just saw the SWBTS report. Maybe I am biased, Paige has done a lot of unethical things and gotten away with it. I went away from it angry. Again.

Debbie Kaufman said...
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Debbie Kaufman said...

No anonymous: It was hoodwimking. And he was good.

Wade Burleson said...

Debbie, what you must realize is that forcing a public acknowledgement that a Muslim deserves mercy, compassion, and grace AT our institutions completely demolishes any action that shows a lack of grave to Drs. Cornish, Klouda, Carter, Hemphill, etc...

Huge shift in SBC today.

Watch

Wade Burleson said...

Grace - not grave.

Freudian slip.

Victorious said...

I watched Patterson's tearful apology and justification (with God's approval in mind). It was in my opinion a great demonstration of "bait and switch" I've seen.

And the applause afterward surprised me as well.

Again, I'm not a Baptist, but my question was regarding the Muslim's apparent interest in the seminary because he saw something different about those at the seminary. Apart from the interest in a degree in archaeology, couldn't a series of meetings with this man have ended in his salvation and understanding of the faith? That would have been a matter of witnessing and discipling which wouldn't have disregarded rules.

Anyway, I wasn't moved by Patterson's obvious appeal for sympathy for his "righteous" decision based on his heartfelt concern for the man's eternal soul.

Anonymous said...

Great spin wade. To say that comprise for the sake of salvation and having standards for professors are the same is ludicrous but great spin

Anonymous said...

Patterson is as dumb as a fox. He outwitted everyone today and got away with what he did. Big surprise!

Beth Duncan said...

Any chance the rest of us in the SBC could see the report from SWBTS?

Debbie Kaufman said...

Grace - not grave.

Freudian slip.


Haha. I can't even save hoodwimking for hoodwinking which is what I meant to write. :) I hear what you are conveying.

I will be watching and barely hanging in. I always do as I do want the SBC to turn around.It's hard for me to give up on it as I still cherish it.

Debbie Kaufman said...

anonymous 4:30: I think you should ponder your comment for awhile, because it makes no sense to me.

I should therefore have stricter and different ways of grace for my family than I do those outside my family and my family should receive less grace. That is what you are saying. It makes no sense and is cruel in my opinion.

Tom Kelley said...
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Tom Kelley said...

From the comments I take it Patterson issued some sort of self-serving apology. (No surprise there.) But was any decision made, or is one expected in the future, which would prevent a SBC seminary president from disregarding the institution's stated purpose and policies?

Wade Burleson said...

Beth,

I am about to post it..

Anonymous said...

Did anyone else wonder if both questions for PP were planted? Just seemed the whole situation was very controlled.

Anonymous said...

Wade is using this for his agenda. Comparing the hiring and firing of staff to a lost student being admitted is spin making Wade look good

Tom Kelley said...

Anon 05:51:00 PM,
"Wade is using this for his agenda."

What "agenda" is that, exactly, besides telling the truth and exposing corruption?

Anonymous said...

In regards to point 5- his degree is not just inexpensive, it is free for him. Patterson has him in scholarship. This is fact! It may not be cooperative program dollars, but it is no doubt baptist dollars.