Listen to I Know Who's The Boss.
This message is the third sermon in the series entitled "What I Wished I Had Known Forty Years Ago," preached by Paul Burleson at Emmanuel Baptist Church in Enid, Oklahoma, January 7-10. The outline is presented below to follow along as you listen.
WHAT I WISH I’D KNOWN FORTY YEARS AGO
“I Now Know Who’s the Boss”
Mark 10:42-45 - “But Jesus called them to him, and saith unto them, Ye know that they which are accounted to rule over the Gentiles exercise lordship over them; and their great ones exercise authority upon them. But so shall it not be among you: but whosoever will be great among you, shall be your minister: And whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all. For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many. And whosoever of you will be the chiefest, shall be servant of all. For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.”
1 Peter 5:2-3 - “Feed the flock of God which is among you, taking the oversight thereof, not by constraint, but willingly; not for filthy lucre, but of a ready mind; Neither as being lords over God's heritage, but being examples to the flock.”
Introduction: Remember Sunday morning I said that in my understanding of marriage forty years ago, we operated best when my wife understood who was the boss -- and “God said I’m the boss.”
I based my view on an understanding of the following verse.
Genesis 3:16 - “Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.”
But is this the way a marriage is to operate? Are men to exert themselves as 'the boss?'
I. The Original Pattern for Relationships
Genesis 1:26-28 - “And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.”
Adam and Eve had a partnership, based upon New Covenant principles reflected in our text of Mark 10:42-45.
II. The Beginning of our Problems with Relationships
After the fall in the Garden, God said two things about Adam and Eve's relationship with each other.
1. Eve … she will 'desire' her husband The word 'desire' is often misunderstood. It means in scripture 'to exert domininion' and the word is used just a chapter later:
Genesis 4:7 “If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his (sin's) DESIRE . . .”
2. Adam … will rule his wife.
Are these two things prescriptive or descriptive on God’s part? In other words, is the desire to dominate or rule a part of God's blessing or curse?
The Scripture indicates that this desire to 'rule' or dominate, by both the man and the woman, is a result of the curse and prescriptive of where men and women are because of sin.
But God by His grace transforms a man and a woman through the power of the Holy Spirit to relate to one another in a totally different manner.
III. The Supernatural Provision for Relationships
Ephesians 5:17-18 -“Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is. And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;”
Without John 3:16 there is no full appreciation for salvation, and without Ephesians 5:18 there is no full understanding of experiencing healthy spiritual relationships -- whether they be pastor/people, husband/wife, etc . . . It is the Spirit of God that enables us to be the person and partner God intends us to be.
So what does a spirit-filled person look like?
v. 19 – joyful – this Spirit produced
v. 20 – grateful – this Spirit produced
v. 21 – serving, submissive – this Spirit produced
The biblical style of relating in marriage is one of mutual submission, mutual service, and mutual dependence on the Spirit of God.